The first time I heard the words “anal” and “fisting” used together, I was sort of shocked. For those reading this who don’t know what it is (hold onto your hat), fisting is a sexual act where one partner introduces his whole hand inside the other partner’s butt.
Now that I have some experience as both a dominant and submissive in the BDSM scene, I think I understand that fisting has to do with intensity and certainly it must require a deep level of trust.
When I saw that the Stockroom (an L.A. based retail store specializing in BDSM equipment) was having a class that included a demo on a male “bottom,” I was giddy. Some of you know that I’ve been turned on by the concept of male homosexual activity since I was a teenager. I’ve explored it by avidly watching the show Queer as Folk and revealing my interest in my solo show.
If by some miracle, the teacher of this class was gay and the demo bottom was also gay, this class would give me my first live glimpse into that world.
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| This website is not for the faint of heart. : ) |
Over twenty of us gathered on couches and chairs in the spacious classroom. Right away, I was put at ease by Damon Holzum– a best-in-class sex educator. He was clear, knowledgeable, friendly and helpful. His first order of business was HIV awareness and safety. He then described equipment, partner communication, preparation, anatomy and technique. I loved this guy – and he was gay!
After the break, Damon introduced the demo model – Jake. Jake is a tall German man. He had lots of muscles and was an affable fellow wearing a sheepish smile. Knowing that I was about to watch an intimate act between these two men, I was in a state of joy.
The part of the fisting equation that I never understood was “why.” Why do it? It seems very extreme – what’s the benefit? What I learned blew my mind. Once Damon had carefully and respectfully worked his hand into Jake’s behind, he was able to touch Jake’s prostate. Jake was transported into a world of pleasure. While we watched in awe, Damon gave Jake an exquisite, prolonged state of ecstasy accompanied by groans and intense breathing. Jake was clearly on a different plane, and it was very, very good.
As if that wasn’t enough of a surprise for me, Jake proceeded to have a full body orgasm – without ejaculating. What is a full body, non-ejaculatory orgasm, you may ask? I have no idea! But I just saw one last night, thanks to these amazing men.
I left the class with some of my gaskets blown. I never expected that I would have a new item for my sexual bucket list. Would I fist a partner? Hell yes! Who wouldn’t want to give a fellow human being that level of pleasure?
I’m just that kind of generous.
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| The wonderful Damon Holzom |
Wow, you GO girl!! Awesome blog! Thanks for bringing this to light, too many folks are missing out.
Agreed!