It was supposed to be only a thirty-day thing, but it’s providing me with so many benefits, I’ve decided to extend it.
My abstinence started several blog entries ago when I did the thing I often do – got together with someone I didn’t know well. Then I felt the thing I often feel – sad. My therapist and I had a good chat about it and concurred that I’d been grappling with conflicting needs – to be cuddled, to be sexual and to be emotionally safe.
Then came the Loch Ness experience I’d read about but could never find – the elusive “snuggle party.” Now that I’ve begun to attend these genius events and am hosting my first on Friday night, my sexual needs and my needs for cuddling can be satisfied separately.
A natural boundary has formed within me. I feel a new self-respect and dignity; I feel protective of precious me. And so I’m taking a break from sex for a while. It’s a way to reset myself, and a way to honor this newfound beautiful thing I’ve found.
Beyond the soulful benefits, here’s an unexpected one: ever since I’ve declared my sexual abstinence, I’ve been asked out repeatedly.
I think the boys can smell a challenge.
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| Tee hee. |